Kids’ Doc in Jos

In a recent gathering, a church leader quoted another leader from an address some time in the past. The quote was, in effect, “When did the last missionary leave Nigeria?” meaning that the missionaries remaining at the time were no longer “real” and were, in the words of the more recent speaker, here for their own gain and not for the good of Nigerians.

The present speaker actually used the quote in passing to commend a present-time “real” missionary, not to say anything against missionaries in general. He was just using a phrase, a quote, for a different purpose. Current relations between the church and missionaries are cordial.

Still, it stung me, and I’ve heard others discussing the same remarks. What, here for my own gain? After all I’ve been through, all I’ve left–children and grandchildren, comfort and convenience, a setting where government and healthcare work? How am I conceivably be here for my own gain? Sure, I have shortcomings as a missionary here–I’m not very social, we rarely visit our co-workers, I don’t smile and greet enough–but do those things outweigh everything else?

Though remarks did sting me and anger me a little at the time, that has passed as I’ve realized they were just a slightly unfortunate choice of words that pushed my/our buttons, not in any way derogatory. They triggered reactions to past remarks made carelessly or during times when church-mission relationships were less warm. Church-mission relationships are a lot like marriages in some ways, and there can be strong feelings and strong words that are best forgotten as we move ahead.

I have been thinking, though, about what lies behind that question, “When did the last missionary leave Nigeria?” and about what it means to us now. Is there still a widespread feeling that missionaries are interfering, bossy? Maybe, though most of us work under Nigerian leadership rather than the other way around. Is it about money? Socializing? Being perceived as too rigid or harsh in our standards? Hypocrisy?

I think that, as in a marriage, this is mainly a problem of perception and communication. As a non-ideal missionary I certainly need to keep trying to make myself acceptable to Nigerians, not only as a reflection of Christ’s love to those I serve, but also as a loving part of his Body along with the Christians we work beside. Perhaps communication can go a certain distance to help our “spouse” the Nigerian church understand that some of our limitations and offenses are not from hard hearts but simply cultural and personality factors that are hard to change.

As for the rest of the gaps between “ought to be,” “perceived to be,” and “the real me,” I’ll have to rely on grace, forgiveness, and the fact that ultimately it is God who will judge my work, not myself or others. (Actually, I’m not particularly happy with that thought either, but that’s another issue.)

I hope I’ll be able to learn a little more about what it means to be a real missionary here as I discuss and explore the issue further.

Finally, and basically unrelated to the above, a quote from today’s Breakpoint, Chuck Colson’s newsletter: “Never despair. It’s a sin, because it denies the sovereignty of God.” (A Baby’s Cry) I tend toward cynicism and giving up, so this is a good reminder. And the context was the recent Supreme Court decision against partial birth abortion and the fact that we should not give up even on our political systems … a good reminder for me in the middle of the Nigerian elections.

This entry was posted on Saturday, April 21st, 2007 at 1:04 am and is filed under Mike's jottings. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.